DEAR MAMA ~ YOUR HEART IS WISE
… And Wise Heart Mamas Series Announcement
There are certain recurring themes I see from some of the brave and beautiful souls who sit in the client chair in my counselling office.
Themes that get to the core of a kind of collective A-ha.
Themes that get to the heart of the matter.
One particular theme resonates deeply with me, as a woman and as a mother. It is a particular kind of internal undercurrent, a low hum that can visit the most awake, nurturing, heart-centered mothers. It is a low hum that I have danced with, and have an ongoing, ever-dynamic, ever-humbling relationship to.
It goes something like this:
“No matter how much personal healing work I do, I still wonder if I am enough. Healed enough, good enough, capable enough, doing enough for my child or children.”
This belief, of course, feeds on the impossibly high societal expectations mothers grapple with.
Expectations that are woven into our current cultural fabric.
We are at a point in history when many are returning to the understanding that parenting with consciousness and awareness is not just a groovy theoretical idea, but it is essential to our survival as a species.
The research is clear: Our sense of fulfillment and health as adults is very much impacted by how we were nurtured as children.
And so first, let us bask in the potential of what this offers us as humans…
Imagine being a child and feeling deeply respected. Knowing in your bones that you are not just loved, but also fully seen, heard, and truly allowed to be ALL of who you are.
Imagine deeply knowing your worth, deeply trusting your caregivers, and having a palpable sense of genuine trust in yourself.
Now, imagine a world where all of our teachers, leaders, healers, and community members were brought up with this kind of deep, unequivocal respect and nurturing of their souls.
This…is our birthright.
So then…how is it that we can sometimes get stuck, while on this conscious path of motherhood?
Here’s the tricky bit: It is so easy to take this information about the essential nature of nurturing our children well, and add a massive amount of PRESSURE onto ourselves as mothers.
Some part of us trusts that we are wired for connection. This part is determined to attend to the legitimate needs of our children as well as the needs of ourselves. This part feels the natural-ness of deeply honouring our children.
And then…something happens. We have a particularly long, sleepless night. Our child acts in a way that triggers us somehow. And if you are like many conscious moms, perhaps this feeds the undercurrent haunting voice: I am not enough. It is my fault my child is behaving this way. I must have caused this.
The truth is that mothering in this day and age, is something many are learning to do, on the job, so to speak.
And so, naturally this is challenging. Naturally many conscious and engaged moms find themselves in the midst of some kind of internal struggle.
How do I raise my children “consciously”, in the midst of feeling so overwhelmed?
How do I get through the moments when I lose it with my kid(s)?
I know in my heart that my children are innately GOOD, but I struggle when their behaviors sometimes seem “BAD”
How do I meet their needs, while also doing my best to meet mine?
We are mammals. We are wired for connection. And there are certain times in our lives when we become more aware of our legitimate need for connection to each other in a palpable way. Mothering small children is one of those times.
Motherhood was never meant to happen in isolation.
Finding and maintaining a sustainable sense of ease is often buoyed by opening to our right to connection & support.
It is my whole-hearted belief that, at this time in history, mothering with mindfulness and deep respect for our children…is revolutionary.
So, here’s to joining with mothers everywhere, in transforming the self-blame and pressure and critical voice
…into a voice of gentleness & self-compassion.
A voice of stepping into the shoes of STEWARDing our children’s souls. And…stewarding our beautiful, creative, wild souls in the process.
And for those of you who are moms to little ones, and feel called to a supportive atmosphere of other wonderful mamas, I invite you to check out the link to my latest heart-full offering below: I am so excited for this one, my friends. It is called the Wise Heart Mamas series. And I’m offering a reduced holiday rate now until the 31st:)
In the meantime…May we all take a collective moment to breathe in the truth – straight to our hearts… that we are enough… here…now.